


Ave Atque Vale

by JoyScott13



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Friendship, Grief, I must hate myself to have written this!, Loss, Not Canon Compliant, S2 finale AU, some malec, sort of some Clace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-04 05:15:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14012973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JoyScott13/pseuds/JoyScott13
Summary: Everything changes when someone on the team dies. The ones left behind struggle to figure out how to cope and move on after such a devastating loss.





	1. Clary

# Chapter 1

Clary stared down at her father as he took his final breaths. Part of her wished she felt more remorse or sadness. Part of her wished he’d been the father she’d always dreamed of. But she’d stopped him; stopped him just in time to save the Downworld, to save everyone she cared about.

Although she hadn’t.

She hadn’t been in time to save everyone.

She should have killed him sooner.

Should have found some way.

Before he…

Before he killed Jace.

The words rang through Clary’s head, sounding impossible and illogical. Jace couldn’t be dead.

Suddenly an idea came to Clary, and, after allowing herself one more look at Jace, she burst into action. She’d stopped Valentine from compelling the Angel – maybe she could use the wish instead. There was only one thing in the world she wanted.

As she splashed into the water the world around her fell dark.

The Angel had gone.

“No!” Clary screamed, bringing the knife down on her hand, barely noticing the pain as her blood dripped into the water. “I have a wish!” Falling to her knees she felt for the Mortal Cup and Sword. But they were no longer there.

Rising to her feet, Clary desperately scanned the lake for some sign of the Angel, “Jace. Bring Jace back.” All she could do was pray that Raziel was still tied to the lake, that he would hear her and be compelled to grant her request. “ _Please._ ” Her voice broke as she begged.

No answer came, no brilliant display of heavenly glory. Just silence.

Clary rushed back to Jace’s side; she didn’t want him to be alone. Not if he woke up. Not if he was… if he…

She collapsed to her knees beside him, shaking his shoulders slightly, “Jace, Jace wake up. It’s me. It’s Clary. Everything’s going to be okay. You just have to wake up. _Jace_.” Every moment he didn’t respond her desperation grew, as did the dawning realisation that this was very real, “I wish for you, only you. You’re all I want. Jace _please._ ” Gently now, Clary stroked his face, wiping the tears away.

“I love you, Jace Herondale. I should have said it back. I love you, I love you, I love you.” Clary’s words turned to sobs and she collapsed against Jace, wrapping her arms around him as though she could somehow keep him safe.

Clary didn’t notice the footsteps marking three other people reaching the lake. But when someone tried to take Jace from her she held on tighter, until she saw a tear that was not her own splash down. Looking up she saw Alec, but his eyes were on Jace, desperate, hopeless. Clary saw her own broken feelings mirrored on his face. She didn’t stop him from taking his parabatai’s hand. Together they held Jace and cried and shared in the utterly unspeakable grief consuming them.


	2. Magnus

# Chapter 2

Magnus could only watch the tragic scene play out before him. Never in his immortal life had he felt this helpless. He didn’t realise he was crying until he felt the first tears fall. It was then he realised that Izzy hadn’t moved from beside him. Her face was contorted in agony, her eyes fixed on her brothers and Clary, but she wasn’t crying. A glance back at Alec and Clary told Magnus that there was nothing he could do for them in this moment, so he turned back to Izzy. Carefully he stepped in front of her, resting his hands on her shoulders.

“Isabelle.” Magnus kept his voice gentle, but he was unable to completely stop it shaking, “Isabelle look at me.” Slowly she did, and it was as though the walls broke. As she threw her arms around him Magnus could feel the sobs wracking her body.

“It can’t be true Magnus, it just can’t. I thought, I thought there was some other explanation for the rune. Because Jace-” her voice broke, and Magnus held her closer, “Jace can’t be gone. Jace is _always_ okay. Magnus it _can’t_ be true.” She dissolved completely into sobs, and Magnus held her, unable to think of anything to lessen the pain.

They only broke apart at the sound of Alec’s voice.

“How? How did this happen? You were meant to look out for him!” Alec’s words were angry, but his tone was broken. Magnus knew he wasn’t trying to be cruel, but to understand. “Tell me how this happened. I wasn’t here, I couldn’t help him. You were.” That was the real source of the anger Alec was feeling, Magnus realised, feeling foolish for not spotting it immediately. Alec wasn’t angry at Clary, but at himself. For not being able to save his parabatai. For choosing to stay in New York.

“I’m sorry.” Clary sobbed, not looking up, “I’m so sorry.” Magnus started towards them, but Izzy got there first, going straight to Alec. So Magnus went to Clary. He wanted to hold her, to move her away from this terrible place, but she wouldn’t release her grip on Jace, so Magnus settled for resting a hand on her shoulder.

“It happened so fast.” Clary’s sobs had quietened, but the pain in her voice would have broken Magnus’ heart if watching Alec suffer through the pain of losing Jace hadn’t already done that.

“We got here first, we thought we could stop him. He came out of nowhere and he… he… stabbed Jace. It happened so fast, there was nothing I could do. I’m so sorry.” Magnus wrapped his arms around her, hoping he was offering some form of comfort.

“I killed him. Valentine.” Clary surprised Magnus by speaking again, a harder edge creeping into her voice.

“Good.” Izzy was the first to respond, her tone cold with anger. Alec reached out and placed a hand over Clary’s. For a long moment they all sat there in silence, lost in unspeakable grief, until Magnus realised that he would have to be the one to take charge in this situation. The other three were still drowning in the wake of their loss; a loss Magnus knew they had barely even begun to process.

Slowly, Magnus rose to his feet, “We should return to the Institute. There is nothing more we can do here.” Magnus kept his voice kind, but he needed them to understand. There truly was nothing more to be done here, and their position was very open. If any Circle members remained and wanted to avenge their leader’s death, they were extremely vulnerable to attack. Especially as Magnus knew none of their reflexes would be very sharp right now. Clary shook her head and mumbled something along the lines of “I can’t.”

“Magnus is right.” It was Alec, and for a brief moment he met his boyfriend’s eyes. Magnus was almost consumed by the grief he saw, before Alec turned back to look at his parabatai, “We need to take Jace home.” Magnus ached to pull Alec into his arms and to make all the pain fade away, but he knew it could never be that simple. Right now Alec didn’t need him so much as he needed the people who shared in his loss, the people whose lives had also been shattered. Whilst Magnus had grown to care about Jace in his own way, more than he’d realised, it would never come close. There hadn’t been time, and now there never would be.

Alec’s words spurred the others into action. Clary kissed Jace’s cheek gently, before slowly getting to her feet. Izzy knelt closer to Jace and whispered something Magnus was unable to hear before standing up and taking a sobbing Clary into her arms. Alec made as if to lift Jace up and carry him himself, but Magnus could see he was shaking.

“Alexander, I can-” he started, but Alec cut him off.

“No. I have to do this.” Alec rose to his feet, carefully holding Jace in his arms as though he didn’t want to disturb him. Magnus knew it was cliché, but Jace truly looked as though he was simply sleeping. Magnus had never seen him look so young, or so peaceful. He supposed Jace’s life had never given him the chance to be either.

There was one man responsible for that, and Magnus wished he could feel more satisfaction at Valentine’s death. The sight of Alec holding his lifeless brother in his arms, whispering “I’m going to get you home,” stopped even the faintest glimmer from shining through. Hadn’t Valentine already taken enough from the boy he had claimed as his son? It hadn’t taken Magnus long to realise that Jace’s confident exterior hid a far more fragile and broken soul, his life destroyed by the very man who had now stolen it. Magnus had hoped that Jace was starting to piece himself back together, and that once they’d defeated Valentine he’d finally have the chance to do so surrounded by people who loved and supported him.

Now he’d never have the chance.

“I can make the portal.” Clary raised her stele confidently, but the portal spluttered and died before it had fully formed. She tried again, and then again, before Magnus rested his hand on her shoulder; he remembered Alec mentioning that Clary’s emotions, if not dealt with properly, could stop her runes from working. Magnus wasn’t sure how you properly dealt with a loss like this, other than with time.

“Biscuit, let me.”

Clary turned slowly to face him, whispering, “I just wanted to help him,” but she nodded, stepping back to give Magnus space.

Alec took Jace through the portal first, followed closely by Clary and Isabelle. Magnus gave Valentine’s body another look. He couldn’t leave it here; it would be needed as proof of death. With a wave of his hand Magnus magically brought the body with him, not caring if it roughly bumped into the ground. The sooner the body was burnt and disposed of the better.

As Magnus stepped through the portal, Valentine just in front of him, he was met with the eyes of what felt like every Shadowhunter in the Institute. He’d had no choice but to portal them to the Institute’s entrance, with the wards being how they were. They must have made quite the scene, portalling in with Alec holding a lifeless Jace in his arms, and Valentine’s body magically dragged through behind them.

After a moment Alec seemed to resume his role as head of the Institute. He ordered Valentine’s body to be sent through to the Gard, but when someone suggested they send Jace through as well, Alec refused, and Magnus knew why. Jace’s home was New York, not Alicante. Idris had never been a place of happy memories for him. Alec gave a series of instructions about ensuring the wards were sound, that the threat from the demons was over, and to inform the leaders of the Downworld that Valentine was defeated, dead, and gone forever.

Then he took Jace to his room, laying him out on the bed. Once Izzy, Clary and Magnus had followed him in, Alec shut the door behind them, before returning to Jace’s side. They all assumed positions around the bed as though it was some kind of vigil, which Magnus supposed it was.

Magnus felt weary to the very depths of his soul, and looking at the others he could see the same weariness, but he knew none of them would be able to sleep for some time. He wasn’t entirely sure what they were going to do next, but he would wait and offer whatever help he could.

It wasn’t long before their silent vigil was broken, the door to Jace’s room being wrenched open. News had clearly reached Idris. The first person through the door was Maryse, followed closely by Robert; Magnus was relieved to see Max wasn’t with them. The pain on their faces was all too familiar now, and they went straight to their children. Magnus moved away from the bed to give their family and Clary room to grieve.  He could only watch as Alec sobbed into his mother’s shoulder, taking what comfort he could. Soon, Magnus knew, Alec would need him more than ever; Magnus had witnessed the severing of a parabatai bond as close as this one once before, and knew the devastation it would bring to the one left behind. Alec would never be the same, not really, but he would find a way through it, Magnus was certain of it. He’d do it for his family, for Magnus. For _Jace,_ who would never have forgiven him if he didn’t. Magnus would make sure he did it for himself too, that he found his way to happiness again. Just as Jace would have wanted.

It was only as he moved away from the bed that Magnus realised the Lightwoods hadn’t been alone. Frozen in the doorway stood Inquisitor Imogen Herondale. Magnus had been in Idris around the time Stephen Herondale had died, shortly followed by his pregnant wife Celine. He’d run into Imogen not long after, and she’d seemed unaffected, other than the ice-cold anger in her eyes. She’d become an unstoppable force, striking fear into the hearts of enemies of the Clave. That was not the case now and as Magnus watched she let out a howl of grief, collapsing to her knees.

Cautiously Magnus approached her, unsure of how receptive she’d be. He sank to his knees beside her, and she turned to him, “I just found him.” Her voice was utterly broken, “I can’t lose him again.” As Magnus reached out to offer some kind of comfort, she leaned in to him, and Magnus put his arms around her. On a normal night Magnus would have laughed to find himself in this position, but this was not a normal night.

Before long someone else stepped through the door; Luke rushed straight to Clary, who buried her head against his shoulder as she sobbed. Maia took a few steps into the room, tears running down her cheeks, looking as though she didn’t feel she belonged here. She must have come with Luke, and Magnus gave her a small nod; anyone who had cared for Jace had a right to be here. Dimly Magnus wondered why Simon wasn’t here, but there was so much grief in the room it didn’t seem to matter. He’d turn up when he could; despite what Simon would have said just that morning, he had lost a friend today too.

As Magnus glanced around the room he wondered what Jace would have made of this, of all these people who so clearly had loved him, whose lives would never be the same because he wasn’t in them. Magnus wasn’t sure he would have believed them, and his heart ached even more for everything that had been taken from Jace before he’d even known he’d had it.


	3. Alec

# Chapter 3

It had been a month since the day the war ended. A month since the Downworld had been saved and Valentine had been defeated. A month since half of Alec’s soul had been ripped away. A month since he’d been whole.

It still didn’t feel real. Alec wasn’t sure if it ever would, if he’d ever understand. He wasn’t sure how anyone expected him to survive this.

They’d asked him to speak at Jace’s funeral. Jace had been honoured as the hero Alec knew he was, but Alec wished they had been allowed a smaller gathering, for just those who knew Jace. He knew his parabatai would have wanted that. But the Inquisitor wanted ceremony and, as it was her grandson, no one dared refuse her. Alec had wanted to snarl at the Shadowhunters gathered there, dressed in white as though they hadn’t spent the days since the victory partying and celebrating without a care in the world. But he hadn’t, with Magnus’ hand in his keeping him grounded. This was for Jace.

Before he knew it, Alec was stood next to Jace’s body, with all those expectant eyes waiting for him to speak. Alec had tried to prepare something, but how could he be expected to put this loss into words. A loss he hadn’t even begun to process. This was _Jace_. His parabatai, his brother, _Jace,_ and he was gone and there was no way to bring him back and there was nothing Alec could do about that, and the words had frozen in his mind. He could never do Jace justice.

He’d been saved by Izzy and Clary, who had stood by his side, each taking one of his hands, before taking it in turns to speak about Jace. They spoke of their love for him, or the pain of losing him, of the pride they would always feel for him. Their voices wavering with grief, they spoke of the true Jace that only those who had loved him had known. Alec knew their words were not for the mass of Shadowhunters gathered to watch the spectacle of the great fallen hero (as though they had not treated him like a traitor not so long ago), but for their family and friends. They were for Jace. Alec looked to Magnus and saw such love and support and understanding in his eyes. For Jace he knew could do this, he _had_ to do this. So he’d started to speak.

Magnus had been at his side the moment he finished, tears streaming down his face as he held him. Alec was so grateful that Magnus was there, that he didn’t have to face this terrible day without the love of his life. It had been the Inquisitor who had allowed it, which had surprised him, but not as much as the way she had embraced him after, telling him it was what Jace would have wanted.

As the days turned into weeks, life among the Nephilim returned to its usual pattern. There was no war, no unusual threat, just life as it had been before the day Jace had run into Clary at Pandemonium. Everything was back to normal; nothing would ever be normal again.

Alec still found himself waking up at the crack of dawn, walking half way to meet Jace for their early morning training sessions, before he realised that there would be no one there to meet him with a sarcastic remark about his ‘sleeping in.’ The first time he’d stopped in the middle of the hallway, and hadn’t moved until Isabelle found him and guided him back to his room. Only Alec hadn’t been sleeping in his room, he’d been sleeping in Jace’s, refusing to let anyone touch it. Even on the few nights he’d managed to stay at Magnus’ loft, Alec had insisted on sleeping in the room that had briefly been Jace’s. Magnus had not said anything, had simply supported him patiently as he always did.

But none of it seemed real, not truly. Not the dull ache in his chest where he had used to feel Jace’s lifeforce so strongly. Not the way Izzy was throwing herself into training and recklessly going on missions, barely stopping to rest or to allow herself to think. Not the way Max had started taking the little toy soldier Jace had given him everywhere he went, just like he had as a small child. Not the way his parents had changed, either bothering their children constantly to check that they were okay or avoiding them altogether. Not the way Clary’s eyes had lost their light, the weight of losing her mom and Jace so close together crushing her. On the surface Alec knew they all looked like they were coping fairly well; they were still going, still forcing smiles, still _fighting_.

The others would all heal, Alec knew that. Their pain would dull and they would find their way through to the light. They were too strong not to, and Jace would have never forgiven them if they didn’t.

But Alec wasn’t sure exactly how you survived when half of your soul was gone. He knew other parabatai had done it, but he could only think that he and Jace must have been _different_. Closer. Their souls had been connected even before they were parabatai, and whilst Alec had once thought that was romantic love, he knew it was a different sort of soulmate. And now Jace was gone.

How was Alec ever supposed to accept that?

Logically, Alec had always known Jace was the most likely to get into trouble. It followed him wherever he went, and Alec had often thought it was like Jace was _looking_ for it. But Jace was Jace and he had always fought through it, against whatever impossible odds life threw at him. He’d always been so full of life that Alec had once thought he was living in his parabatai’s shadow, even though he knew Jace would have been the last person to think of Alec like that.

The fact that it had been Valentine of all people that had ended Jace’s life, after all he’d already put him through, made Alec angrier than he’d thought possible. Anger, that was what was holding Alec together. Anger at Valentine for all he’d taken. Anger at the world for allowing this to happen. Anger at Jace for being gone.

Anger at himself for not being there for his parabatai, for not fighting by his side at the end. For not protecting him.

Alec was familiar with anger, it kept him moving forwards. It stopped him crumbling. If he let anything else in he wasn’t sure he’d be able to keep going.

On this morning he’d sat for an hour or two in the training gym, watching other Shadowhunters train. He’d wanted to join them like he once would have, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. They weren’t Jace. When he’d left the dull ache in his chest had seemed heavier than ever. He’d gone back to his own room to freshen up and grab a change of clothes, and it was only after he’d finished showering that Alec had noticed the difference. Someone - Izzy most likely -  had placed three photographs around the room.

Shadowhunters did not really take photographs, or display them. These pictures were all fairly recent, and Alec knew they must have been taken by Clary. Mundanes did love to photograph _everything_. The first one to drawn Alec’s eye was just of Jace, laughing at some long-forgotten joke that had been told in a moment of peace. He looked just the way Alec wanted to remember him. The next picture was from Max’s rune ceremony and Alec remembered when Clary had taken it. At the time he’d complained that they weren’t _Mundanes_ , they didn’t need to waste their time on something like that, but now, looking at this photograph, he was glad they had. It showed Jace, Isabelle, Max and Alec all together and happy. The last photo was just of Jace and Alec, although he wasn’t sure when it had been taken. Alec felt such a rush of love and grief start to swell up inside him, and he had to take a step back and turn around. He couldn’t allow himself to feel that, not now. Maybe not ever. Not if he wanted to stay strong and keep fighting.

As he turned around Alec’s phone buzzed, but it wasn’t anything important; it wasn’t something he could distract himself with. But after reading the notification Alec found he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the date. He wasn’t sure why this date seemed important, not at first. But then his eyes found their way back to those photographs and he remembered.

It was Jace’s birthday.

Not the birthday they had all known and celebrated for as long as Jace had been part of the Lightwood family. It was Jace’s true birthday, the one he had only recently discovered. He’d mentioned it in passing to Alec. At the time Jace had been trying to play down how significant it was that he knew his real identity, how it had utterly rocked his world and how he was struggling to comprehend it. But he’d mentioned his birthday, and Alec had known how important that date was to him; Jace had said that this year would be the first time he would get to celebrate his real birthday, knowing who he really was. Now he’d never get the chance.

Jace would never celebrate another birthday again.

All at once it was too much for Alec as the truth sunk in, finally, completely, devastatingly. Jace was dead, he wasn’t coming back. He’d left Alec alone, without his parabatai. He’d taken the brightest parts of Alec’s soul with him.

Alec felt his knees give out as he collapsed to the ground and the first sob wrenched its way out. He’d not cried like this since Lake Lynn on the night Jace had been taken from him.

Every emotion Alec had held at bay came crashing down on him, and he struggled to breathe as the pain of it hit him. Jace was dead, murdered, and the world was moving on without him, just as Alec was supposed to. He had never felt so alone.

Somewhere deep in his mind Alec knew he wasn’t alone, that losing his parabatai didn’t mean he had lost everyone that mattered to him, and it was that part that managed open his phone and find the number he needed. Alec was only able to get two words out when the call was answered.

“He’s gone.”

Then the phone fell from his hand and he curled in on himself, heaving sobs wracking his body.

Before he knew it he heard the sound of his door opening, and someone carefully entering the room. Alec couldn’t bring himself to look up to see who it was, to see if it was who he hoped it was. Who he needed it to be.

“Oh, Alexander,” Magnus whispered softly as he pulled Alec into his arms, “I’m here.” Alec buried himself into his boyfriend’s arms, letting go completely as he sobbed, “He’s gone, he left me, he’s gone, I can’t-”

Magnus only rocked him as the words finally came pouring out, his hand gently running through Alec’s hair. As always Magnus’ presence grounded Alec and reminded him that he was not alone. Alec wasn’t sure he’d ever understand what he’d done to deserve Magnus’ love, but he realised he had come to fully believe in it.

Alec wasn’t sure how long they sat like that, but eventually his sobs subsided and the tears stopped flowing. Finally, Alec had opened up, had spoken aloud things he had barely allowed himself to think because they were too painful. He had told Magnus everything, had let all his walls down, and Magnus had simply held him. He’d know just what to say, what Alec had needed to hear. Normally Alec would have been embarrassed to be seen crying like that, to be so _weak_ as to sob out his agonising grief in such an uncontrolled way. That was _not_ the Shadowhunter way. But with Magnus Alec felt only acceptance and love and understanding. For the first time in a long time his heart felt full, or as full as it could without his parabatai.

Slowly Alec moved so that he could hold Magnus too, “Thank you for coming.”

“Of course I would come, my love.” Magnus’ voice was still soft, and so full of love, “I will always come when you need me.” He paused, before adding, “I’ve been waiting for you to let it all in, wishing I could do something to help you.” Alec thought back over how patient Magnus had been these past weeks, always considerate and gentle and understanding. He’d known Alec would break like this, but hadn’t pushed him. He’d allowed him to deal with his grief as he’d needed to, in his own way. He’d understood what Alec had needed and been there for him without fail. Alec’s heart swelled with love and he held Magnus closer. He felt lighter, and whilst the ache in his chest remained, Alec felt the tiniest glimmer of hope.

And then he had an idea. He knew just the way to honour Jace on this day that would have been so important to him.

So that night, just before sunset, Alec gathered together everyone who had been important to Jace. They met at Jace’s favourite spot in the Institute, ever since he’d been 10 years old. The balcony offered a beautiful view over New York, particularly as the sun set.

As they all looked out across New York, Clary commented quietly that Jace had once brought her here because he’d wanted to share this place with her. The tone of her voice and the tears shimmering in her eyes told Alec that this had been one of their brief moments of happiness together before that fateful mission, and he’d moved to her side and taken her hand. His voice only a little louder than hers, he told her of the time, not long after Jace had moved to the Institute, that no one had been able to find him. Their parents had been beside themselves searching for him, but it had been Alec who had found him, right here, watching as the sun went down over his new home, mourning what he had lost. It had been the first time Alec had seen Jace cry, the first time he had silently held his new brother in his arms so he would know he was not alone. Alec didn’t tell them of the day not long ago that he had found Jace here in the same way, he kept that moment to himself, for Jace.

Max spoke next, surprising them all, his young voice wavering as he told them a story of the day Jace had woken Max from a nightmare and given him his precious toy soldier, telling him that it would make him brave just like it had made Jace brave. Maryse spoke next, then Isabelle, then Robert, then Magnus. Even Simon and Maia and Luke. One by one they all took turns sharing their memories of Jace, prompting laughter and tears. At some point Magnus had conjured them all chairs, and so they sat together, sharing stories full of their love for Jace, watching as the sun set.

Just as the horizon went dark, Alec noticed some movement from the doorway. Imogen Herondale took a tentative step towards them, and from the tears on her cheeks Alec wondered how long she’d been listening.

“Thank you for your invitation Mr Lightwood, I’m sorry I couldn’t be here sooner. I’m not sure if you all really want me here. I know I didn’t know Jace like you all did, but I-” She took a deep breath, “I just wish I’d had the chance to know him better, to let him know how much I loved him.” It was such an uncharacteristically honest emotional outpouring from the Inquisitor that Alec felt stunned into silence.

It was Clary who rose to her feet, going over to Jace’s grandmother and taking her hand, “Come and join us, we can help you get to know Jace. He was so happy to have found you.”

“He was happy to know me?” Imogen asked Clary, her eyes searching for the truth, for Clary’s words to not be some sort of empty platitude.

“He was, even if he wasn’t sure what to make of it all or what to do about it. Please, come and sit with us.” She offered a small smile, gently leading the Inquisitor over to a seat that had just appeared next to Maryse’s. Isabelle began a new story and the gathering continued as it had before. All the people who had loved Jace, all those who had lost him, together and sharing in their love for him.

This was what Alec had wanted to celebrate Jace, the sort of funeral he deserved. Just the people who had mattered to him, and the strength of their love for him. Alec felt less alone in his grief, and closer to Jace than he had since he’d felt the pain of his death and their rune fading away.

Losing Jace had made Alec feel like he’d lost his footing, lost his place in the world. But looking around him at his friends, his family, Magnus, Alec realised he’d never be lost. He would always have a home with these people, and they would make sure Jace was never forgotten and always loved. He would live on in their hearts and their memories and stories, giving them strength as they moved forward without him. Without him, but never alone, because they would always carry Jace with them. Maybe the legends were indeed all true, and Jace was with the angels now, watching over them. Maybe Alec would get to see him again. Just maybe.

As they all sat crying and laughing, remembering Jace and all the good times and hard times, Alec felt the ache in his chest lessen, and for a moment it was as though Jace was back with him, like he’d never left. Alec smiled to himself as he realised, maybe he would never have to. Jace could never really be gone, not fully, not while all these people kept fighting in his memory. His parabatai would always be a part of him, of them all.

As the stars began to twinkle overhead, Alec and his family, for truly these people were all his family now and forever, raised their glasses to Jace.

“Ave atque vale, Jace Herondale, hail and farewell.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I must really hate myself! This was so painful to write, I made myself cry several times!! I am VERY glad that this didn't happen, but this idea wouldn't leave my head until I wrote it down! So here we are, I have done something I never thought I'd do - killed my favourite character in a fic! 
> 
> Please let me know what you think!
> 
> (We are SO CLOSE to Season 3 now... Jace is going to make me suffer!)


End file.
